The Dirty Bouquet

  White sheets are my love language The morning thought 💭 I wanted to type... I erased (it was funny 🤷🏾‍♀️) but  one thing I know about me...I have the power to will a reality that I really don't want to happen just by thinking or saying.  my heart can't handle that. I'll chill.   just go with the photo caption. xoxo - Flynn

 True story...and I should have typed "Vodou" instead.  Anyway, more on this later in an upcoming blog. 

  fast sports car ✔️? no car ✔️? half a mil in assets and growing✔️? no assets ✔️? small starter home i've lived in for 20+ yrs  to nix extravagant bills and thus the need to work into perpetuity ✔️ travel when I want ✔️ European bag brands 🚫 and never will... This bag though?...I did. I found Karrica.co on TikTok.   A luxury bag brand founded by a beautiful black woman. Everyone talks about quiet luxury...I decided that this would be the route to flex mine. In what I call, Low-Luxe.   ******************************************************* REVIEW The La Cindi Bag is a beautiful, leather croc embossed bag, with gold hardware, suede lining and a convenient magnetic closure. I simply can't wait to dump more "things" into it. It's a deep bag with a slight pocket insert I use to hold my license and a few other cards. I've worn it whenever I'm out and so far so good.  A few heads have turned trying to decipher the logo for research I suspect.  I own ...

  I don’t stay bottom   Spirit gave me instructions today > Blue, orange  for the monarch butterfly and the bug seen this am during a morning smk sesh in my backyard.   Both floated near by, in rhythm. First the monarch and then the unknown bug.    What struck me the most was how blue that damn bug was.    I watched it intensely to make sure it wouldn’t attack. Lol.   Both however… not staying bottom.  They floated...flew. Something I've been wishing i could do lately. Spirit spoke and hinted at “intuition” . Why? What do I mean?   I've been consulting ChatGPT lately because my soul has been disturbed after searching for information/confirmation my brain just can't seem to let go of surrounding someone. I found it.  I was led by intuition.  The info hurt and swelled in me like raging fire. It had to be revealed I guess. It caused tears, confusion...resentment towards the one true “essence”, Elohim . And then, as the bl...

A beauty review drop to come soon.

  I'm learning that what appears to be two equal sides can in fact be an illusion.  Congruency is a fallacy?  The "agreement" is...one-sided? Yes.  So, this is my achilles heel.  I enter into situations that I believe to be genuine and usually end up in defeat.  They say there is a lesson in one's mistakes and I do agree but that typically leads to self-isolation for me. I never realize just how naive I am until it occurs.  It occurred recently with several people, strangers, loved ones and I've been isolating now for a year plus.  And while I do miss these people deeply, besides the awareness here's what else I've learned and what I'm most proud of... My "detach" game? Oh, it's elite. But, I hate playing it. I really adore the thought of getting to know, trust, indulge, and love.  Yet all of these things as I'm learning are actually weaknesses? On what planet can one actually align and truly trust that they are valued/seen? 

I took this photo of this man on a ride to work on Metro one morning. I couldn't believe this B was facing me. I was pissed.  I did chuckle a little though at his audacity. Now on to it. Health Anxiety...I have it.  Okay, I'm not going to put THAT into the atmosphere...I had it.  Because of what I perceived was extreme weight loss.  I recently began working out again after two months of monitoring myself because of it.  and by monitoring myself, I mean doing absolutely nothing. Waking up and living, no working out, eating whatever just to try and gain weight.   Just when I think i've gained a few pounds the next day, gone.  kept smkng / drinking and even began eating meat to "see"...nothing. The only thing that relieved me a little was remembering the doctor's visit I had in early when I registered at my current weight with clothes on. That means I would have been less naked right?  Does that make sense? so essentially, I've gained? I even h...